Proper Etiquette
Public restrooms are places where nightmares spawn. Fraught with homeless people, uncomfortable silences, indescribable smells, “water” puddles…
One of the easiest perils of the restroom to avoid, the Jackson Pollock smear over the toilet seat and surrounding area, is solved with simply SITTING DOWN ON THE TOILET SEAT!
HONESTLY! HOW CAN ONE NOT SIT DOWN WHEN DROPPING A DEUCE?! WHEN HAS THE HOVER-SQUAT EVER PRODUCED SOMETHING BESIDES PURE, UNFILTERED DISASTER?! CAN YOU EVER BE SURE THAT YOU WON’T FIRE OF A VOLLEY OF “WARNING SHOTS” BEFORE THE MAIN LAUNCH?! SIT DOWN FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD AND BEAUTIFUL!!!
…we even provide seat covers for those who are afraid they’ll catch butt disease by sitting on a toilet. The back of your thighs are much cleaner than what falls into the bowl. Doing the “crouching tiger” only begins the vicious cycle.
